Monday, October 31

10th Day - 14/10/2005 (Friday)

I wake this morning feeling sore over my shoulders and left side of my neck. I hope that it were already morning and not 2a.m. or something. After all, I did sleep at 1a.m. I find out from the nurse that it is around 5 in the morning. I am thankful as I really could not go back to sleep. Once awaken, it is a chore to go back to sleep. One that is usually futile. I’ll just stay awake and wait for the muezzin’s call for Subuh prayers.

I am so excited at the notion that in about eight hours, I will get to see my mother. She needs to see that I am okay, so that she doesn’t worry about me. I have to be strong for her. Mostly I have to be strong for myself. To be resilient and courageous at whatever challenge I am thrown into, at whatever adversity I might face.

I hope my catheter comes out today. It’s a pain to have it in my thigh all the time. Hope that it’s not infected or anything.

A new batch of doctors come and take my history for the exam on Monday. And then the other doctors come and confirmed that the catheter in my thigh will finally come out today. I really hope there are no future stitches involved. Ahh, we’ll see….

Oooh, it’s now 12p.m. Cannot wait for mama to arrive. Lunch is terrible. I have barely touched the food when I decide that I have had enough. There is a sweet consolation though – a nice succulent cool watermelon slice. Mmmm… crunchy, sweet and cool in my mouth.

Mama comes and we hug. She is all teary-eyed and emotional. We have a great deal of catching up to do, so we immediately start chattering nineteen-to-the-dozen. My sister Aqilah and my dad arrive about an hour later. It’s nice to see them again, even though they have to leave soon after.

Now I await the visit from hubby. At about 4.30p.m., one of the doctors comes to take out my catheter. I am anxious as I do not know what to expect. The first question I ask is whether I would need stitches (or what is known as sutures), and he replies in the negative. I am so thankful and relieved. He then retorts with, “You breathe in, I pull it out.” Some doctor’s joke, huh? So I sit still while he and a nurse prepare to take it out. First, they clean it with all kinds of funny coloured alcoholic concoctions. One is actually the colour of blood. Then he snips the previous sutures and then asks me if I were ready. My heart feels like bursting at the anticipation. I nod and he pulls it out. It’s out! I’m free! Oh hurray! He asks me if it were painful and I replied with a shake of the head. He plugs the wound with more gauze and says that we will now wait for the bleeding to stop.

The doctor tries to check on the wound but blood gushes out, forcing the doctor to press it further. So the three of us sit and stare at one another. Haha! This is so funny. Then I ask if I could see the tube and the nurse shows it to me. I shudder, thinking how that thing has been a nuisance for a whole week. Well, the ‘nuisance’ saved my life, so to speak. The doctor puts clean gauze onto the wound and plasters it. I am ordered to remain still for a while. Now I excitedly wait for hubby’s arrival.

I hear that they will put me in one of the rooms here. Well, no such luck yet. Hubby arrives and again, like always, we chat about all that has happened since his visit yesterday. He actually has a “buka puasa” do with his office colleagues, but he’d turn them down. He tells me that tomorrow he might come a little earlier than usual, it being a Saturday and all, but he has to leave early too, to break fast with his family. I am a bit disheartened, but I must remember to be reasonable. The world doesn’t revolve around me alone. And, he should spend his time with them, as it has become sort of our ritual to sleepover the weekend at mama’s and papa’s home. I enjoy my visits there all the time.

It is night time and I’m still here. Maybe they’ll move me tomorrow morning. Who knows? Guess it’s lights out. G’nite….

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